Mi'Raah,7

Mi'Raah
by J. Ingram

Seven:  Horse Huntress, part 2

There was some shuffling in the horse-god's ornate stall.  Koriandra assumed that Odeon and his High Priest might get an earful at feed-time, but when she rounded the corner, sword in hand, there was only a familiar-looking obnoxious, dark-haired man clutching feedbag to his chest.

"You can't have any."

"I'll say--Odentalis?  What in the Seas is wrong with you, eating horse-feed?"

He shrugged, and stuffed another handful of grain into his mouth, spoke around crunching it.  "I haff to taste this... fursh." a swallow, "Or, Odeon won't eat it.  Alright, so, I admit the damned Gymkhana is getting to me.  Mi'Raah's really gotten ahead with ten paternity spells and an audience of worshippers given free carriages, vacation-voyages to the Sun Isles and what else--"

"Odentalis, a contract with my Chief has been breached.  My mares, Ina and Kanna are with foal--I never wished for them to breed.  And the condition they are in, on top of that, is worse.  Foaling mares can be athletic, not so fat they're going to fall over.  And they were thirsty, ragged, dirty... I watered them, for this morning, but how will I ever recover them, afterward?"

"Oh, put that sword down, before I excommunicate you and whistle for the whole herd to run in and have you kicked."

Koriandra cussed hard, then obeyed.

"Now, Rider Kori, what happened to the mares you and your Chief gifted to Jyst isn't really so different from you trying to get yourself under the late Prince Bonnis, for an edge--though now, we can't hope to ask him for an unbiased account, can we?  For the holy record, I'm not in control of whatever you females do."

Koriandra shoved the High Priest, hard.  Odentalis dropped his food a moment, shocked and thinking.  Then, he shoved her back. 

"For someone who sets around all day eating molichaff and lying to his priests, you're surprisingly strong, Odentalis..."

"This isn't girth, it's muscle.  Don't you mock the High Priest's weight when he has an image to keep--"

Koriandra was taller.  She braced low, kicked out his footing, and let the headlock she took guide Odentalis in crashing the rest of the way down.  She then forced fingers into his nostrils and craned his head back, to pin him there.

"You dangled Ina and Kanna in front of my face all this time, telling me that one day, I'd ascend rank and earn the right to ride my own horses again.  I trained them up from phillies, I raced them right alongside the Great Hunter himself, through His sacred fields..."

"And then, per agreement, you gifted them to the Jystian King when you converted."

She panicked, "Why corrupt all that I have left?  After I sacrificed for my Chief and abandoned my tribe..."

Odentalis barely managed to speak the next bit, "So then, you feigned conversion to the horse god all this time?  You were sent here, to Jyst, on some errand on behalf of Fahrwandur?  Filthy spy."

Koriandra finished crying, but she feared to let Odentalis up.  He slapped her hand away, and was able to use his strength to budge her off.

"I am the only one who can... I can kill Mi'Raah and get away with it.  A dead dissident can't charm the King."

Odentalis considered.  "You did an excellent job with Bonnis, didn't you?  I can tell.  Though, if she overpowers you, as I suspect she can, Koriandra, then I won't vouch for you.  You'll be dead and... well, I suppose I win, either way."

Now, hours later, Koriandra slapped Mi'Raah's hands away:

"I thought we'd become friends, Mi'Raah.  I said for you not to deal with me like that."

"You were my captor only yesterday.  If you truly cared for me, Rider Koriandra, you would have never set up on your horse and watched Odentalis beat me.  I'll never forget it."

"Don't be offended.  It's my job.  I'm the lowest rank, slated to ride behind the herd in the place of the weak.  High Priest Odentalis wants me to earn favor.  I think that, if I can prove that you are harmless, I may be able to convince him and the King as well, to let you go.  It's terrible to do this to a lone woman, with no family or protectors..."

"Oh, don't pull that sisterhood filth on me again." Mi'Raah wanted her robe, but Koriandra didn't dare move and get it for her.  "And I realize that now I can finally complain about the smell of this place.  Is that dung, down there by your foot?"

"Heh.  Alright, so you can read me.  My true goal is to be right about this situation.  I showed you mercy back there, on the royal road.  Odentalis found out about it.  If I don't give him some good reason, then he will consult the Council about my banishment from the Holy Herd."

"Wrong again..." Mi'Raah sang.  "All creatures are from the water.  They have pulses.  I thought you were listening back in the throne room.  I can tell when people are lying to me."

"But you can't read minds, or else you wouldn't let me stand so close to you."

"Stop buying yourself more time."

Koriandra scratched beneath her cheekbone, then cracked her neck.  "Do you think I care whether or not you really live or die, Mi'Raah?  I'm about as certain or in control of your fate as I am convinced of horse-power."

"So then, you don't believe in the horse god Odeon either?  I sensed revulsion--that was the very speed of your heart just now."

"I could be revolted by you instead."

"I may not be able to read minds, Koriandra, but I can make a very good guess at why I've not been given my robes yet.  Now your heart races with an eager sort of..."

Koriandra blushed and flew into speech.  "Horses are prey animals.  Which means, no matter what, they are stupid and more concerned with being fat and happy and following their fattest, happiest leader.  And that doesn't count for much.  Perhaps I would have been sold, if this whole thing was a pride of lions--as I am a hunter--but the King and all his forebears are obsessed with horses.  Some centuries ago, it just happens to catch on."

"Testify!  And so sister-girl, why are you here, on this island, on these horses, if you hate the god Odeon so much?  Why keep watch over me when I'm legit now according to contest rules and a guard shouldn't be needed?  Why are you letting Odentalis lead you when it can't be a love for him that you're holding onto?"

Koriandra snapped her mouth shut, looked away.  "I didn't work, for a year, to resort to this.  Throw the contest, Mi'Raah, that is what I stayed on to say.  Then I get the promotion I badly need.  I'll pay you anything."

"Rebuke!  Oh, she's got demons in her, she's still a liar!" Mi'Raah cheered.  "Oh, Sea!  Settle your salt essence on this bald one's shoulders, bless her, sap the moisture pressuring and muddling her thoughts.  Bead it on her skin.  No, erupt it.  Make her shout it out!  Give me the truth!"

"You cover yourself already!  Stop dancing about when I haven't been with someone in a year." Koriandra covered her mouth.  "How did you--?"

Mi'Raah winked.  "It was Prince Bonnis, wasn't it?  But you didn't enjoy it.  That is the source of your anger."

"I'm not..." Koriandra pressed hands flat against her scalp.  "I wasn't afraid to do whatever it took, to get these damned Jystians out of Fahrwandur, forever.  Even deny my true self... Every island in the Known Seas wants to fight its wars on our Sacred Plains and with our weapons, with our mercenaries, according to our ceremonies... I came here, because of the Chief.  I gave away my horses for the chance to... and then Prince Bonnis showed an interest in changing Jyst.  I was asked to attach myself to him, bewitch him, marry him, share his title and make sure that he would overthrow the horse god and whatever else, with Fahrwandur in mind.  If I'd done that, then I would have been able to come and go to Fahrwandur as I pleased, with nothing owed to my Chief except for a wife's useful gossip about her husband.  A settled life with space for Ina and Kanna... I swore that it would be worth it, I could do it.  The Jystians had purchased earth--our land--and I had hope of little else!  Then, just this morning, I found that I gave up my horses, my girls, to what else but abuse and distress?  All the while I've been out there lying about my creed and my passion.  I hated to do it.  It went against myself, Mi'Raah, I crossed terrible lines I set down a long time ago, when I first became a woman..."

Mi'Raah hugged her.  "Shh..."

"And when he learned that I was not a lover of men, Bonnis refused to marry me, to help get free me of this entrapment in this fake religion.  He was going to expose everything.  After all that work... the Divine Dagger came over me.  The Great Hunter was calling me... I stabbed the Prince until he died.  A servant was blamed."

"Divine Dagger?  No, you are too angry, girl.  For how long has Fahrwandur been trying to take over this kingdom?"

"We haven't allies if that is what you are thinking, though everyone in the Known Seas is probably after their own piece of Jyst.  I'm Fahrwandur's last hope."

"Haha!  Well hallo there, fellow vulture.  Would you like to work together?"

Koriandra dropped a hand to her side, feeling the pommel of her sword against the inside of her wrist.  She cursed and took a breath instead.  "You are irritating beyond belief, Mi'Raah.  Just when I thought I might care... who are you, really?"

"The one who is going to dredge the very liquid of your blood up through the pores of your skin by osmosis if you don't help me." sad smile.  "Immortal creatures can die, you know.  Nothing personal, shiny-headed one.  I just take this silly contest very seriously.  Let's join up, as the horses do."

"Even though you know I cannot be trusted?  I have lied to both you and Odentalis this morning when he charged me with spying on you too, surely you realize that now.  Nor can I be converted to something I don't really care for."

"You don't need to care, Koriandra, you just need to have a winning smile, and look good in silver."

"Will the horse god Odeon die, then?  That will be difficult when the stallion is rarely seen.  I did try hunting him once.  I assumed that the horse must come in for his feed each day, but it turns out that not even Odentalis himself is completely sure of where Odeon is all of the time."

"Ugh.  Odeon must be a very pretty pony, for everyone to be so stuck on his wayward, fat ass." then, Mi'Raah pouted.  "Are the beauty standards different on this side of the sea?  Should I be eating more?  High Priests, especially the priestesses, are eternally cursed with an anxiety over their image."

"That is not an answer."

Mi'Raah dressed herself.  "I have a boy-friend, or... a friend.  No, a stalker... Some kind of man in my life, or perhaps a fiance?  A fiance who wants to make me his second wife.  Don't mind me, humoring myself is what keeps me sane when he's a fiend.  Well, this man is something horrifying to me, in case you're getting any ideas, Koriandra.  I can't escape him, he is watching us with real intensity, and you'll be hurt if you think this is going to be anything more than a strategic alliance."

"You aren't my type anyway, Mi'Raah." Koriandra smiled, "Because you're crazier than Odentalis, or all the other High Priests in these Known Seas, put together."

Mi'Raah laughed, "Good.  Though I do admire you, Koriandra.  I'm learning that it's not necessary to sleep with men in order to take their power away."

"I'll let you make that terrible joke at my expense, now that we're on the same side."

"...Thank you.  I might have needed it."

The two women walked out into the courtyard together, a field with statues of pleasant, grazing mares.

"...Did the bottled message tell you anything else about me, Mi'Raah?"

"I explained already, Koriandra, I perceived everything about you on my own."

"With your superior sea-powers?  Come on, be honest about what you're really capable of."

"No, it was your look.  If you couldn't be allowed to protect me while--in--the bath and not along the walls, you were going to be aroused to the point of murder.  And then I also had this strange sense that you'd done it before."

"Aren't you a clever little joker...  You and Odentalis are more alike than you think, Mi'Raah.  I just feel so inspired, by the end of each day, to take the both your heads off with this sword."

...

Mi'Raah will be right back, after these messages:  Um... stay cool? I'm all out of message.

(Randitty-O-Meter:  7, I just noticed that Koriandra is four syllables.  This should be fun to play with.)

Mi'Raah,6

Mi'Raah
by J. Ingram

Six: Horse Huntress, part 1

Mi'Raah, once again somebody's high priestess--though, all over Jyst, they weren't yet clear whose she was--enjoyed this fresh new status the contest gifted, with an elegant morning.

At present, however, Mi'Raah was beginning to question whether it was a bath in milk-and-honey hallowed female politicos were used to?  Or, was it just the milk by itself?  No, the blood of a thousand virgins?

"Don't look at me like that, I can't help you."

Mi'Raah blinked at Koriandra, who'd spoken.  In her silver-headed morning haze, it was suddenly vague which of them had the power to sense mortals by their auras or shifts in heart palpitations.  The bath was in an ancient style, a sunken tiled floor with a platform by edge for servants or... spectators?  How odd.

"What, can't you read minds, Mi'Raah?"

"No, I cast scientific perceptions and then I work miracles based on a womanly instinct.  There's a difference, you'll see."

"I am stuck guarding you through this contest, but I don't believe in you Mi'Raah.  There's yet another difference."

"And such thorough guardianship it is..." Mi'Raah frowned that her bath was starting to stick and curdle.  Worse, a strange, loud bubbling started at the far brink of the sunken base.  Koriandra drew her sword.  Mi'Raah shouted for Koriandra to stop being so aggressive for once, and just leave it be.  And then Mi'Raah begged, cried, for Koriandra not to engage dislodging the cork plug, but the other woman was already arm-deep in caramel muck.

"Gods and Seas, this is awful.  Mi'Raah, why can't you just bathe in water, like a normal person who's fooled the King of Jyst and his man-pet Odentalis into handing power over, on a silver platter... This is stuck tight--"

"Remove your arm, Kori, or you may lose it!"

The clog was on the wrong side of what should have been a simple drain.  Water was only meant to flow down and out, but now it fired up.  Koriandra got blasted in the face.  She tripped and fell in the pool of bathwater, armor and all.  Mi'Raah caught her round the shoulders and made a spectacle of it, as if they were both drowning, and then tried to force her captor onto the aqua tiled floor, so that they could both 'escape', Mi'Raah said.

"Blame you and skin cats!" Koriandra spat out sugary milk and wrestled Mi'Raah back into the brewing water--you haven't bathed in weeks, I can still smell it.  The clog's gone, and so I'm definitely going to see that you finish, Mi'Raah!"

"But it's more that I've been afraid to..."

Upheaval, rage and miasma!  Both women shielded themselves from the far end of the bath when suddenly some object burst free, flew past them and crashed on the opposite wall.  The wild object blasted a classic mural of three dancing woman to crumbs, beheaded them.

"Damned thing..." Mi'Raah waded to that end, grasped the slippery edge, and reached through debris for a gold bottle.

"Was that the clog?  It didn't break?"

"It never does.  It shows up in my soup, or in a puddle b'neath my sandals... which is why I rejected dinner and refused to go out into the rain.  Oh, but now I learn, it isn't opposed to finding me in a damned bath--with no water in it.  And here I believed I was being ridiculous, for preferring to stink."

Within the familiar gold bottle was a letter:

Dear Mi'Raah,

After discussion, the other captains and I have concluded that there must have been treachery where Prince Bonnis was concerned.  If he was murdered, then a true enemy to the Crown and its horse god may still be in the castle and able to help you.  Do you see how we might still use Bonnis--the late Bonnis--to our advantage?  Therefore, the plan has changed.  I order you to find the schemer and exploit his plot to our cause.

(And then there were several more small pages during which Arudelle berated Mi'Raah for trying to leave, then fawned over her, a sentiment which completely withered at the tail end.)

...Does this mean we can get back together?

Mi'Raah angrily ate the paper when Koriandra wanted to read too.

"There's that look again.  You're an odd woman, Mi'Raah."

But Mi'Raah realized that she was not looking at Koriandra, but through her, behind her.  Feeling the anger behind the woman's pleasantness.  Enforced pleasantness.  Koriandra was always so wary because she was exhausted.  She felt she couldn't trust anyone.  So then, why did she stay so nearby?  How could Koriandra stand it when there was a very storm in every artery around her heart, thundering?  Soon, the bile and blood were going to broil and break forth to mark everyone, like the milk and honey still trickling down the walls and dripping from the ceiling.

Mi'Raah, as slick as if she'd been born, grasped Koriandra's jaw and looked into her eyes.  "Don't move.  I think I need a sample of your saliva."

"For what, you crazy witch?  Nobody touches me like that--"

"I am going to work a miracle.  And, I am already beginning to sense... that you may like it."

A week earlier (while you were on paperclip safari)...

Rider Koriandra did her usual whistling hard when she came within view of the Royal Livery.  Odentalis would know she was there in time enough for chores, but Koriandra hoped it might also mean the obnoxious High Priest wouldn't feel a need to actually see or speak to her.

But on this morning, the seventh since the Holy Gymkhana started (it was what those in the Jystian Court had started to call Mi'Raah and Odentalis' religious show-down), the Royal Livery was not just left wide open, but it was desolate.  All the stable hands were off doing something Odentalis must have wanted.  Something grand, wasteful and stupid, like shouting at the farrier's to fit gold horse shoes, probably... Koriandra rubbed her middle finger in idle circles over her scalp, rather than be seen scratching the tattoo all over her shaved head--was everyone, truly the entire priesthood and Odentalis' stooges, really gone?

No one had told her, the foreigner, the omega priestess.  She'd been left behind.



A bird sang.  Korianda stole fistfuls of her shirt.  A pulse of fresh air came too, as she began to walk again, this time, west.  How many years had it been?  Odeon might really be out there, through so many rows of abandoned halls.  No one at all, mucking out stalls, brushing down coats, or glaring at her tattoos, though Koriandra did miss the cowering.  She dared breathe again at a second turn, a wider corridor, then walked faster.  What of the horses?  The whole herd must have been turned out, with god Odeon and his consorts.

Go faster, girl.  Run--or, don't--suppose there are animals left, and they spook.  No, fly, flee!  Inna and Kanna should be just out there.  So good to see something Fahrwandrian and unspoiled.  Her heart could sail on clear, for about another age, if her girls were really out there.

The bright wood architecture began to frame green pasture beyond.  Koriandra never imagined that her eventual trespass would be silent, in daylight and direct.  She spied two of only a few training saddles kept for newer horses or untrained foreign-breeds and managed to heft at least one down from the wall.

Now, out in the air and those sun-kissed fields at the brink of sea-cliffs, the world was big and hurtling out in all directions.  Koriandra felt empowered to run like the horses did, to scream and laugh about how there had only really been a hundred and eighteen steps between an omega priestess' regular chores at the head of the Royal Livery, and the animals she so loved and missed riding.

"Ina?" Koriandra called, then, "Kanna?"  A tangle of mares far out lifted heads, but went back to grazing.  Not a one came to her.  "They can't have forgotten their names?  Unless, Odeon is there with them." Koriandra crouched, for fear.  No monstrous black stallion.  Only round, gently hovering things.  Careless of the stable hands, to have rushed out war-mares to join the broodmares and consorts. 

The horses intent on grazing could not be moved, but Koriandra at last found two bay mares.  Koriandra covered a smile.  Yes, those were the brands.  A stylized black horse, and then its other half, a white skeletal temple drawing.  Together, they made the very tattoo covering her head and slipping down her back.  Her girls. 

But something was wrong.  Koriandra approached the horses from the side, petted who should have been Ina, along the belly.  Kanna, barely within reach of her fingertips, had the same problem.  Both horses looked exhausted, with grossly distended flanks.  Where was their water?  Both mares were sweating hard.  So they had become Odeon's mates?

"Where are you?" Koriandra yelled at the top of her voice.  So many horses startled around her, "You son of a bow-legged dam--come out! I see what you did to them... Oh, how could you do this to them?"

Odentalis was found soon after, whether he was usually wanted at this hour or not.

"You promised me a great many things when I came here, Odentalis, and I pledged so much in return--but I never, ever gave you permission to over-feed and then breed my good Fahrwandrian mares into the ground!"

Where was her sword?  Where were her arrows?  Koriandra was going to find that sniveling Odentalis or his false god and tear them to pieces...

...

More Mi'Raah tomorrow, in Horse Huntress, part 2.  Giddyup!

(Randitty-O-Meter:  6, I have some cool pics of Koriandra coming up!)

Randoodle, 5

Randoodles
by J. Ingram

Four: The Origin of Office Supplies Species 

Eopaper Clippius, 50 million years ago.

What happens when you google 'the origin of the wild paperclip' and nothing substantial comes up?  Well, another great thing about Washington, DC, is that you can find any wonderful book about any topic your heart might dream of... at the Library of Congress.  While Valerie struggles to recover from an angry retaliation by Titan (not to worry, he targeted her shoestrings), I decided to do some research on the mysterious origins of the elusive wild paperclip.  Hopefully, it will broaden our story.  Above, is a page taken from Theodore T. Marsner's The Origin of Office Supplies' Species.  It is a fossilized primordial paperclip discovered 1,000 years ago--in excellent condition isn't it?  What appears to be a female fossil is lined up next to a modern-day male Silverback, for perspective.

One can only wonder at the amazing size of the ancient golden female paperclip.  What does it suggest about the dimensions and regal nature of her lost mate of 50 million years ago?  What does this must mean about their diet during the Early Eocene Era?  This was also the age of the early horse, known as Eohippus.  Additionally, I wonder at downtown's Natural History Museum not featuring Eopaper Clippius, when its sparkle might cheer a lot of the exotic models and fossils.  Imagine an entire mural of early Paper Clippius!

 Though the tiny rubber stegosaurus is chronologically misplaced, many of the other ancient species are excellent together in a museum-ish setting--even the exotic faux-clip, which imitates a vicious safety pin.

...

More Mi'Raah's a comin'!

(Randitty-O-Meter: 6, It's not a pile of stuff.  I swear, it's a mural.)

---

Chapters
1 Paperclip Wisdom :: 2 The Mighty Silverback Paperclip :: 3 The Stripey Link Clan :: 4 The Origin of Office Supplies Species :: 5 Paperclip Savers are Environmentalists Too :: 6 The Blackest Friday

Randoodle, 4

Randoodles
by J. Ingram

Two: The Mighty Silverback Paperclip
 

The adolescents must wait their turn, while the cliplings feed.  For having this omega status, perhaps their sire is not the current Silverback?  In a plentiful time, one senses an aura of tragedy...

Our photag, who wishes only to be known as She Who Fears Public Ridicule--I'll shorten it to Valerie--has tenderly named this family the Stripey Link clan.  I suspect it is for the two adolescent paperclips with vibrant hides and similar mischievous personalities.  The Silverback of the family is as noble as he must be, their mother behaves near to her strawberry sweet color as well and the babes scuttle along playfully, but the adolescents often challenge the family dynamic with silly skirmishes or practical jokes. 

In a strange picture Valerie showed me, that might have upset so many animal welfare organizations, the Stripey Twins had fastened themselves to the laces of Valerie's tennis shoes and gone for a ride, flipping up and down the street and in the grass too, much to the horror of the alpha male.  Valerie carefully plucked them off and returned the twins to their family, but the diverted show of adolescent aggression was not missed by their alpha parents at all.  The Stripey Twins were later observed being kept strictly at the back of the herd by exhausted mother Strawberry, as punishment.  When will they be turned back out into the wild world, as the rogues they are?  We hope it won't be too soon!

But, as summer temperatures continue to rise in Washington, DC, the Stripey Link clan has found itself making longer journeys in search of food and water.  In time, this brought the silver male Titan (named for his scarce tolerance of the Stripey Twins he seems very dismayed at having fathered) and the rest  of the paperclips, to a dry grassland.  There seemed to be some sweet clover-flowers around and not much else worth nibbling on.  But the tempting scraps, the clan soon found, were not unguarded!  Strange creatures emerge:

Titan is a seasoned Silverback.  He sees the lone den of pin-cubs first, then immediately prepares for an attack by their parents.

In sequence, the photographs make little sense.  A skirmish started then ended itself like lightning and Valerie scrambled to capture it.  Some other small silver creatures appeared before the dried clover, there was a brief stand off with Titan undoing himself to reveal one long, bright fang--which we hadn't known paperclips were capable of!  The remainder of the Stripey Link clan then ran off, just as Titan threw himself at the enemy, and completely alone.  As they tangled--literally--six enemy Pinnius Safteyus were counted, including two cubs nested near an anthill.  These tinier ants even came out to watch the amazing silvery struggle.

And so, we have at last identified one enemy of the Paperclip--though it is not yet clear whether this was a case of the Stripey Link clan stumbling onto the nesting grounds of highly protective Safety Pins (and now you know where the 'safety' comes from), or if the Safety Pin pack were out hunting and then glad to find easy prey wandering so close to their den.

Five of the safety pins, even the two pin-cubs, bare their sharps fangs at poor Titan!

All that is certain now, is that the Stripey Link family have separated over the skirmish.  Titan's fate against so many is yet unknown, and if the Stripey Twins are matured by the experience or resentful at all, then they may seize the opportunity to rise as alphas, themselves.  The two could be swinging in the trees to strengthen lanky sinew forms and shed bold stripes in favor of a grown male's proud silver-sheen, as we speak.

If so, then does this suggest cannibalism among paperclips?  We cannot be sure of whether paperclips are, in fact, their own greatest enemy, until Titan fights his way back to his red mate and their cubs, and through a harsh metropolitan wilderness!


(To Be Continued...)

...

More Mi'Raah, this week...

(Randitty-O-Meter:  8, These guys are cute.)

---

Chapters
1 Paperclip Wisdom :: 2 The Mighty Silverback Paperclip :: 3 The Stripey Link Clan :: 4 The Origin of Office Supplies Species :: 5 Paperclip Savers are Environmentalists Too :: 6 The Blackest Friday

Randoodle, 3

Randoodles

by J. Ingram

Three:  The Stripey Link Clan

The other side of the issue.

Last week, while explaining the Paperclip Bar, it occurred to me that most people probably only have experience with the tamed paperclips we see on our desks:  handfuls upon handfuls of the bowed Silverbacks.  Sad, listless creatures having finally succumbed to a bitter end.

Before spirits dull and rusting sets in, before the capture and packaging of their mighty Silverbacks, all wild paperclips have surprisingly complex, though tinny social structures, and there are also severe environmental obstacles to their survival.  The gargantuan size difference in most objects, for example... It is a little-known story of the lone office supply which is, in fact, not.

Paperclips are sweet, noble creatures who face worse challenges than we do--and this has been true since the onset of the modern age.  Paperclips struggle simply because they are so small, made of metal, and sometimes encased in pretty, pretty plastic, and also really, very good at holding delicate things together (whenever a stapler can't be found).  Much as in the wild, where paperclips are closely linked to their own families.

The colorful red female shows small cliplings how to feed, while the majestic Silverback fastens himself strategically in the foreground.  What resourceful little creatures!

Here, the Silverback protects his family--called a herd, or sometimes a Chain--while they feast on berries in the trees.  Paperclips are natural climbers, being able to use strong, smooth jaws to fasten paper-thin leaves up against their flat bodies.  Once low-hanging foliage is found, it is then only a matter of sliding up the leaf, clipping successively higher to eventually reach food and safety in the emerald canopy.  One can also observe from the picture that the young, called cubs or cliplings**, must link together in order to climb as well as their parents.  It is a useful protection technique too, as they will seem much larger and mature in the trees when chained, often dissuading predators from attack.

And, from what do such harmless little creatures have to fear predation?  The natural defenses of paperclips seem to suggest many thousands of years of evolution.  Paperclips have long been defending themselves against something more ancient and menacing than the large, nationwide office supply conglomerates (we'll talk about the cruelty of staple-shooting machines later). 

Sadly, so much about wild paperclips is still unknown.  But thankfully, our photographer, who seems to have gained the trust of the Silverback, has offered to go on safari and risk herself for one week in order to try and unravel so many mysteries...

(To Be Continued)

**Note:  Young paperclip cliplings are often packaged as 'mini-paperclips' in the black market office supplies trade where, beyond the cruelty of it, that term is a gross misnomer when the little ones don't possess jaws strong enough to defend themselves, as do their parents.

...

More Paperclip Safari! and Mi'Raah later this week, homies.

(Randitty-O-Meter:  ??, Let's wait and see how wonderfully weird this gets, first.)

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Chapters
1 Paperclip Wisdom :: 2 The Mighty Silverback Paperclip :: 3 The Stripey Link Clan :: 4 The Origin of Office Supplies Species :: 5 Paperclip Savers are Environmentalists Too :: 6 The Blackest Friday